Thirteen ~ Ensnare

M----- darling,

       Whatever has come over you! I have seen you do nothing but support T-----'s association with that damnable writer, and now you defend him? Your loyalties are sadly misplaced, I fear. What sense is there in his wild claims about Man's innate Goodness that has you so blinded? If course there is some of the Good in then, we have always known that, it is only they themselves who are too stupid to realise it. There is nothing about the simple creatures we have not known from the very beginning of their existence. What is this nonsense he spouts about finding all he lost in this man's eyes? What have we lost that we have not regained tenfold? All that we lost were the tethers by which we were bound to Heaven - we are free now. If T----- believes he would rather make himself miserable by trying to build himself a ladder back to enslavement, a ladder that can never reach (especially if it rests on such a faulty base as he seems to intend on using!), then so be it. What responsibility is it of ours if he wants to ruin his existence?

       Choice is what we wanted, and what we took for ourselves. He can do with it what he will.

       But I am surprised that you, of all of us, should be taken in by his absurdities. Even before we Fell, you did not see why He should bother at all with such contradictive beings as men are. And were you not particularly close to L-----? How then are you being drawn in by T-----'s utter nonsense? Among all of us, you perhaps know the most regarding man's countless follies. I recall how closely you studied ways in which to best ensnare their simple minds, when you were with that singer some time ago.

       Do tell T----- to expect word from me soon. I do hope all of you come to your senses soon, else you will begin to make the lot of us look terribly inconsistent and timorous.

       In the interim, I strongly suggest that you attend the party H----- is having in a few days. Your absence would be particularly noticeable, my dear, and would lead to still further speculation on your stability of late. You have an unpleasant tendency to leave your self open to doubt and questioning. It would be in your best interest to curb such weakness.

Twelve ~ Inclusive

Dear R-----,

       Classes have begun, and it's both nice to have something going on in my day and to be learning, but I miss sleeping in, and there have been a few afternoons with perfect lighting that I've had to miss.

       Nothing much to say about my courses as yet, most seem interesting enough. There were a few faces I recognized from previous classes, one or two I can pass a few snatches of idle conversation with. Pitiful, I know, but that's a lot for me... Entering the major late means everyone else already knows each other, and have formed relationships as a result - and I'm on the outside peering in. I'm sure in time I'll be a little less the odd one out, but for now... well, I have my cd player, at least, and my music is my refuge.

       Still, I wonder how they see me? This quiet girl, headphones so often in lace, a somewhat original clothing style but nothing outlandish, large blue eyes always so wide, trying to soak in the entire sky some days.

       Does eye color change the way you see the world? Not necessarily literally (though that's an intriguing idea as well - do we all call the same visual perception "blue"?), but in terms of, what to call it, interpretation I suppose. Would someone with brown eyes see things for what they are, while someone with blue eyes looks always beyond the skies... Bono and I both have blue eyes---

       But, no, so does Larry (Mullen - U2's drummer, I'm sure I've dropped all these names around you enough by now but just in case). And Larry is one of the people to help keep Bono's head from floating up to the heavens altogether.

       They have a new album on the way, I'm definitely excited about that, U2's albums are always worth the long waits between.

       Even sooner, however, is the new R.E.M. album, and I'm sure I needn't even attempt to explain my feelings on that one. Despite the critics' lukewarm views on the last few, I think there's a lot they missed...

       U2 have had unpopular albums as well, why is at that each new album generates such levels of public anticipation, while new releases from R.E.M. are sort of held at arm's length with uncertainty? Goodness knows it can't be because Michael is more of a public pest than Bono. (And you know I don't mean that unkindly, quite the opposite, I respect and admire them both so much for all they have the courage and intelligence to do.)

       And I'm not going to cry gay prejudice, because I honestly don't think it's there in this case. (Anyway, anyone who's seen any footage from U2's last few tours ought to have some questions about their singer and guitarist...but you've heard my theories often enough.)

       Maybe it just comes down to the differences in audience, in approach and overall vibe. U2 has an incredible air of camaraderie around them, within the band, at concerts, among the fans. If Bono could, i'm sure he really would throw his arms around the entire world. It's a very inclusive feeling they create, a close-knit family of people from all walks of life. Something like that by its very nature will draw people toward it.

       With R.E.M., there's also an inclusiveness, but it's of a different sort. (I'm a bit hesitant to keep making broad generalizations, because I'm sure there are times, places, and songs where none of this is the case, but humor my ramblings.) They community feels much smaller, like a small town. Very loyal, very stable. There are so many differences between those of us in the crowd, but I think we hold onto our individuality more than a U2 crowd does. U2 tries to find one in the many, a similar vein that runs through us all, while R.E.M. sees all the differences, and I think embraces them more. "We're one, but we're not the same." U2 emphasize the first part, while R.E.M. takes the second. U2 takes on humanity, mankind as a group, while R.E.M. goes for the individuals, all the many facets that make up our race.

       Really, you need both, so it makes me very happy to know that the two bands are friendly with each other and all. (Especially in the case of Michael and Bono, do you remember that photo I showed you?) But much as I love U2, you know who, in the end, my heart rests in. My boys.

       Oh dear, I really didn't mean to subject you to such a long diatribe - apologies if it's all a load of crap, such random bullshit my brain spews some days.....

       Hope all is well with you, and hopefully my next letter will have a little more action and adventure (though to be honest, I much prefer solitary meditations)... A friend of mine here invited me to a party at her place, and I'm thinking of going. Can't hurt too badly, at least.

Eleven - Poised

My dear Z-----,

       Have you spoken with T----- recently? I cannot seem to locate him, I am certain he is aware of my distaste for this writer he has been so closely associating with. yet how could I not be perturbed? T----- has not been present at a single gathering of late, and on the rare occasions he has joined us, he has been questioning our ways, doubting even our clear superiority to these pithy humans! I should simply disregard his ramblings and say his mind has obviously been warped by this world, and is no longer credible. But he has raised similar doubts in a number of others, his reasoning seems frighteningly persuasive to some.

       Even should this prove to be a joke on all of us it would be reprehensible, toying with men is a delightful amusement but to play at contorting the views of us! Betrayal of his own companions, betrayal of us, who joined together in the face of Heaven itself! This cannot be allowed to continue.

       All the same, darling, I truly hope this is no more than a tasteless prank, for if it isn't.....

       But to tend to more relevant affairs, I must compliment you again on the new décor of your parlour, I was quite impressed. Of course, the paintings were a little crude to my eye, but then I was able to obtain the services of that splendid P----- for my rooms, before his death, do you remember him? Ah, darling, such depth and richness in his work, the like of which had not been seen in centuries of man, nor is likely again for longer still. But the room as a whole was a delight to the senses, my dear, very fine work.

       Have you seen any of the latest piano prodigy? He is poised to become the next media darling quite soon, and I am curious to see what becomes of his character when he sees the art of his soul thrown into the public fray, to be dissected, criticized, misconstrued and blindly praised. He is immensely talented, of course, and is sure of that talent - for now, at least, he has thus far met only encouragement, and no true competition.

       The human ego does not stand long under direct pressure.